Author Topic: Proverbs by Larry the cable guy  (Read 2451 times)

Offline Smokebender

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Proverbs by Larry the cable guy
« on: March 11, 2010, 07:14:16 am »
Proverbs by Larry
 
 
 1. A day without sunshine is like night.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
 
4.  99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5.  Remember, half the people you know are below average.

6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture most people have.

10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?

21.. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, 'What the heck happened?'

22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
 




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The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

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Offline misfitguy

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Re: Proverbs by Larry the cable guy
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2010, 07:37:40 am »
I will always cherish these and may put a couple on a T-Shirt or two.  Thank you.

Mick
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~Groucho Marx

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Offline Smokebender

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Re: Proverbs by Larry the cable guy
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2010, 09:11:51 am »
Me too Mick. I enjoyed numbers 1, & 13 and 14 the most.    ~D~
The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/michiganbigfootgroup/  Just click it now! Then get back here right away or I'm tellin Mom.

Offline misfitguy

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Re: Proverbs by Larry the cable guy
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2010, 09:55:53 am »

I think my favorites are 2, 14 and 18.  I also like #22 about world sucking.  A version I have seen on a T-Shirt is "Gravity Sucks".  I cracked up when I saw that.  A version I have pondered for the particularly religious would read, "Gravity Sucks....and you can thank God for that one."

Mick
Go to www.misfitscentral.net  Why not?

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

~Groucho Marx

"The world is one country and mankind is its citizens..."  Baha'u'llah

Offline eneevehg

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Доставка роллов Азнакаево, Яна юл, Манауз
« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2017, 07:29:45 am »
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