Author Topic: Joke of the day  (Read 20382 times)

Offline Smokebender

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #15 on: December 27, 2009, 01:10:35 PM »
A salesman is driving toward home in Northern Arizona when he sees a Navajo man hitchhiking. Because the trip had been long and quiet, he stops the car and the Navajo man climbs in.

During their small talk, the Navajo man glances surreptitiously at a brown bag on the front seat between them.

"If you're wondering what's in the bag," offers the salesman, "it's a bottle of wine. I got it for my wife."

The Navajo man is silent for awhile, nods several times and says, "Good trade."

The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/michiganbigfootgroup/  Just click it now! Then get back here right away or I'm tellin Mom.

Offline Smokebender

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #16 on: December 31, 2009, 03:05:42 AM »
Just wanted to let you know that the New Homeland Security Bill has passed. Things will be different now and internet surfing as you know it will be tracked by what the FBI calls a 'nonintrusive method.' The FBI says you will hardly notice anything different.  

For a demonstration, click on the link below:  

Homeland Security http://users.chartertn.net/tonytemplin/FBI_eyes/


« Last Edit: December 31, 2009, 03:07:48 AM by Smokebender »
The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/michiganbigfootgroup/  Just click it now! Then get back here right away or I'm tellin Mom.

Offline Smokebender

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #17 on: December 31, 2009, 03:12:55 AM »
More Attempts to Translate Academic Jargon

'CORRECT WITHIN AN ORDER OF MAGNITUDE' ...
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

'ACCORDING TO STATISTICAL ANALYSIS' ...
Rumour has it.

'A STATISTICALLY-ORIENTED PROJECTION OF THE SIGNIFICANCE
OF THESE FINDINGS' ...
A really wild guess.

'A CAREFUL ANALYSIS OF OBTAINABLE DATA' ...
Three pages of notes were obliterated when I knocked over a beer glass.

'IT IS CLEAR THAT MUCH ADDITIONAL WORK WILL BE REQUIRED BEFORE A COMPLETE UNDERSTANDING OF THIS PHENOMENON OCCURS' ...
I don't understand it....and I never will.

'AFTER ADDITIONAL STUDY BY MY COLLEAGUES' ...
They don't understand it either.

'A HIGHLY SIGNIFICANT AREA FOR EXPLORATORY STUDY' ...
A totally useless topic selected by my committee.

'IT IS HOPED THAT THIS STUDY WILL STIMULATE FURTHER INVESTIGATION IN THIS FIELD' ...
I am pleased to feed you this rubbish.

The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/michiganbigfootgroup/  Just click it now! Then get back here right away or I'm tellin Mom.

Offline misfitguy

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #18 on: December 31, 2009, 07:01:53 AM »
Just wanted to let you know that the New Homeland Security Bill has passed. Things will be different now and internet surfing as you know it will be tracked by what the FBI calls a 'nonintrusive method.' The FBI says you will hardly notice anything different.  

For a demonstration, click on the link below:  

Homeland Security http://users.chartertn.net/tonytemplin/FBI_eyes/




That is just too good.

Mick
Go to www.misfitscentral.net  Why not?

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

~Groucho Marx

"The world is one country and mankind is its citizens..."  Baha'u'llah

Offline Smokebender

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #19 on: December 31, 2009, 02:55:16 PM »
Manufacturer's Funny Warning Signs
On Nytol Sleep Aid:

'Warning: May cause drowsiness' .

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On Nobby's peanuts:

'Warning: contains nuts' .

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On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:

'Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication' .

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On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

'Product will be hot after heating' .

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On a Myer hairdryer:

'Do not use while sleeping'.

The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!
We are the ones we've been waiting for.
A Hopi elder speaks.

http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/michiganbigfootgroup/  Just click it now! Then get back here right away or I'm tellin Mom.

 

sir-individual